Nothing against the hairy ape-man himself, but I’ve never quite understood the obsession with Bigfoot. Possibly it’s because he’s the most realistic and likely to exist of all the mythical creatures and aficionados are only waiting for that one piece of indisputable evidence. Or maybe people just want to be his friend. Who knows? I do know there are hundreds of stories of mythical creatures in our country and I went on a (very short) quest to find some of them. And let me tell you, some of these babies are downright frightening.
1. Loveland Frog
]A large, bipedal amphibian-like creature, the Loveland Frog has supposedly been sighted around Loveland, Ohio, on several occasions. The first was in 1955. More recently, the X-Project Paranormal Magazine reports (from ultra credible sources, I’m sure) a police officer saw the creature around 1 a.m. on March 3, 1972. At first, the poor guy thought it was a dog and pulled over to help only to find it was actually about 4 feet tall with leathery skin and frog-like face. A second sighting, again by a police officer, happened two weeks later when yet another officer thought he saw an injured animal by the side of the road and pulled over to help it. Obviously this was a poor life choice and the man was scared out of his underpants. Supposedly he tried shooting it, but missed. Both officers remained anonymous (probably because they know the rest of us will think they are nutter balls).
2. Jackalope
This is a mysterious antelope/jackrabbit crossover species that is stuffed and mounted on the walls of many an oddball tourist shop across the Western U.S. Supposedly, the jackalope was popularized in the 1930s by a couple of taxidermists who started selling the mounted animals to tourists in Douglas, Wyo. Those wishing to hunt a jackalope are cautioned to wear stovepipes on their legs to avoid injury from their vicious kick. And while stores in Douglas sell jackalope milk, I frankly question the authenticity of this “milk.” Everyone knows milking a jackalope is a deadly endeavor.
3. Hodag
A hodag is an animal that roams northern Wisconsin, generally around the vicinity of the city of Rhinelander, which has an annual festival, ostensibly to satiate the beast and keep it from killing everyone in the town for another year (I definitely didn’t just make that up). Supposedly, the hodag was first captured and photographed in the late 1800s (before Photoshop, so obvioulsy it’s 100 percent real) and newspapers reported the beast had “the head of a frog, the grinning face of a giant elephant, thick short legs set off by huge claws, the back of a dinosaur, and a long tail with spears at the end.” An angry mob (pictured) supposedly rounded the beast up and killed it. But its ghost probably lives on and will eat you in your sleep if you ever go camping in the Wisconsin woods.
Have an idea for a listicle? Get in touch. Moroney may be contacted at kmoroney@lmtribune.com or at (208) 848-2232.
